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| “ | Lawyer Kong: Before HE joined all those years ago... things in Nintendo Land used to be normal. The day SMG4 arrived, everything changed. He spread his memes like a disease across the Mushroom Kingdom and everyone became stupid. SMG4: I just wanted to make videos... Lawyer Kong: So now, I've gotten permission from Nintendo to make this massive wall to keep all the non-Nintendo trash out! And better yet, everyone on this side of wall will go back to their normal selves! |
„ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong to SMG4, Meggy, Mario and Luigi in "SMG4: Mario Can't Play With You Anymore..." |
| “ | It's over. | „ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong after getting Miyamoto to sign the DMCA - his infamous quote. |
| “ | ♫HOLD IT! Don’t give me your lecture! Your argument here is pure conjecture! The defendants are vile and no doubt insane! They’re small leeches who’ll bring a world of pain!♫ |
„ |
| ~ Lawyer Kong’s first lines in the WOTFI 2022 rap battle. |
Funky Kong, also known as Lawyer Kong, is a major antagonist of the Australian adult-animated comedy web series SMG4, serving as major antagonist in the Modern Era, specifically as a minor character in Seasons 7 to 11, one of the main antagonists (alongside Niles) of Season 12 and the main antagonist of The Lawsuit Arc.
He is a corrupt lawyer working on behalf of a stricter and progressively more draconian Nintendo Headquarters, aiming to kick SMG4 and all of the series' influence and aspects out in order to restore the SMG4verse's iteration of Mushroom Kingdom to its original status as Nintendo's Mushroom Kingdom. He is the former second archenemy of Mario, SMG4, and Meggy.
His Evil Ranking[]
What Makes Him Heinous?[]
- He tried to forcefully take Mario away from SMG4 and use his power to scare him with the threat of deleting his channel.
- He got permission from Miyamoto to set up a giant firewall inside of the Mushroom Kingdom to block out every single non-Nintendo character from ever getting inside.
- He turned the Mushroom Kingdom into a police state where non-Nintendo characters are mercilessly hunted down, memes are persecuted, and everyone is brainwashed into being their original selves.
- He kept trying to push Miyamoto into signing the DMCA to delete SMG4’s entire channel, something that Lawyer Kong really, really wants to happen.
- He sabotaged the heroes attempts to stop it by pushing away the parody contract Meggy had which could fight against the DMCA. As a result of the DMCA, every single non-Nintendo character dropped dead on the spot.
- What makes it worse that some of them are kids, like Jub Jub, meaning that he had no problem having children killed.
- After he temporarily succeeded, he decided to give other people C&Ds by assaulting them for example he crushed Frankie’s head for making a Roblox game of Mario.
- He attempted to prevent Mario from delivering the parody contract even if it means by shooting him.
- He nearly strangled Mario to death when he delivers the parody contract to judge Kirby, despite him practically being Nintendo's golden child.
- When Kirby was ready to start the trial after Mario send in the parody contract, he tried to convince him there’s no need for a trial due to them already signing the Super DMCA.
- Even when the heroes fight against him, he continued trying to fight against the DMCA all on his own in order to keep every single non-Nintendo character dead, even brainwashing the Nintendo characters to help him out during WOTFI 2022 as he plans to do his indirect genocide again if he wins, and when he does, he will finally be able to shut SMG4's YouTube channel for good, even if it means it could potentially lead to the end of the SMG4 Universe.
- Even after his defeat when the Super DMCA was destroyed, his actions still result in SMG4, SMG3, Bob, and Fishy Boopkins, having to look different for the rest of their lives if they want to stay with their friends, and isn't very redeem himself.
- In Mario Plays Cursed Mario Games, he attempted to sue Mario for copying off Sonic only to get kicked out.
- Despite the high heinous standards of the series, Lawyer Kong stands out for being one of the most powerful and villainous characters in the series, as his goal aiming for the complete and total genocide of every single non-Nintendo character in the entire SMG4 universe which, considering how many of them are known to live there, easily adds up to the hundreds of thousands to the millions range. He isn’t super heavy in terms of resources just being a normal lawyer when most of the other super heinous villains have powers of some kind. That is not to mention his other crimes such as turning the Mushroom Kingdom into a police state.
- While Lawyer Kong technically isn’t the one who signs the DMCA which wipes out all non-Nintendo characters he is the one who is actively pushing Miyamoto to sign it and sabotages the heroes’ attempts to undo it on his own accord. So, his role in making it possible is way too huge for him to qualify as a pawn who fails to Miyamoto, and Lawyer Kong does all of this with glee.
- Despite him work for Miyamoto doesn't seen isn't very care of him and manipulating him to signs the DMCA.
- While one could argue that he is a well-intentioned extremist, his actions are not motivated by good intentions but rather by racism towards non-Nintendo characters, so he's ill-intentioned.
What Makes Him Inconsistent?[]
- Despite being taken more seriously in the arc, he still has too many comedic moments that make him not serious enough to be NPE. Even if he is taken more seriously in The Lawsuit Arc with his crimes genuinely being played for horror, it's also worth pointing out that he will likely be taken less seriously in future episodes of the series as he returned to his normal self after said arc. His very character concept is also inherently played for laughs, as he and his name are a joke based on how members of the Kong Family have adjectives before their surnames.
- He is somewhat honorable as he willingly allowed SMG4 and Mario to say their final goodbyes.
- There are times where he showed remorse for his actions, such as in SMG4: Mario Gets into NFTs (although was Funky kong). In said episode, he tries committing suicide as he felt guilty for giving Mario NFTs, which he was using to cause chaos.
- Although he doesn't show full remorse for his actions in The Lawsuit Arc, he gives up on his plans because not even Nintendo agrees with him. As a result, he becomes a weapon salesman at the end of WOTFI 2022.
External Links[]
- Lawyer Kong on the Villains Fanon Wiki
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 Inconsistently Heinous
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Canon Non-Canon Fanon | ||
 Inconsistently Heinous
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